I knew it was going to be a crappy day when i woke up this morning and banged by head on the headboard before being fully awake. The sudden realisation that a long day stretches out before you where anything and possibly everything can go wrong.
It happened in the car. I forgot something so reached for the door handle. The internal plasticky widget mechanism thingy snapped. I was stuck until i figured out that if i wind down the window, reach out and pull the outside handle, i would be free. I reached for the handle, only for it to break off the spindle and come away in my hands. It was not yet 9:30am. What a shitter of a morning i've had...
I had to shuffle across the seats and let myself out from the passenger side. Looked a right twat i did... if anyone was watching. Now i have to exit my vehicle via the passenger side and do the broke door shuffle.
Don't they make cars like they used to..? You know, big lumbering beasts where everything was made of good old Sheffield steel and rust? I blame the Japanese for bringing in cheap, lightweight, fuel efficient plastic cars. At least in the old days of British made cars like the Austin Allegro, made by a lazy, unionised British workforce, you were safe in the knowledge that if the car broke, which it would, it was down to good old British shoddy workmanship and not a cheap plastic widget that can easily be replaced.
Now i've got to go and buy a cheap plastic widget... Bastards.
Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.
It happened in the car. I forgot something so reached for the door handle. The internal plasticky widget mechanism thingy snapped. I was stuck until i figured out that if i wind down the window, reach out and pull the outside handle, i would be free. I reached for the handle, only for it to break off the spindle and come away in my hands. It was not yet 9:30am. What a shitter of a morning i've had...
I had to shuffle across the seats and let myself out from the passenger side. Looked a right twat i did... if anyone was watching. Now i have to exit my vehicle via the passenger side and do the broke door shuffle.
Don't they make cars like they used to..? You know, big lumbering beasts where everything was made of good old Sheffield steel and rust? I blame the Japanese for bringing in cheap, lightweight, fuel efficient plastic cars. At least in the old days of British made cars like the Austin Allegro, made by a lazy, unionised British workforce, you were safe in the knowledge that if the car broke, which it would, it was down to good old British shoddy workmanship and not a cheap plastic widget that can easily be replaced.
Now i've got to go and buy a cheap plastic widget... Bastards.
Paul Martin is @ukcameraman on Twitter.
not to mention a new window arm, those are important
ReplyDeleteI wondered why it still didn't work..!
DeleteI am glad to have alleviated your misery, if only seemingly, for a short while. Good work on the blog, it is difficult to find humorous writers online these days. When I say humorous, I mean it in the vein of everyday misanthropy and preferably UK based. You are now added/followed on Facebook and I will do my best to spread the word of your apopleptic ramblings among those of my fellow friends who retain some brain cells, which are sadly not all that many :-)
DeleteEveryday humour is my thing. I'm so glad you like my writing, as well as sharing it. Thank you. Are you really 'Anon' or are you MI5..? Not that I'm paranoid or anything... but I have some shitty views on our ruling class, amongst others...
DeleteActually, that last comment makes me look like a real paranoia freak... Ignore that. Spread the word of my grumpiness... And thanks once again Anon...
ReplyDelete